Why we do try so hard? It feels like an itch we keep scratching without any relief. We try to help people, we try to change ourselves, try to fix things, we try to achieve things yet it always feel like we fall short. The more we try to love someone, the more we push them away. On the mat, we try to go deeper into a pose and our body resists, we try to sit still and our body keeps fidgeting. We try, we fail, we try again and the cycle continues.
How do we stop trying?
When we are trying, we are always forward looking, forward thinking and forward moving. There is something external we want and we put forth our energy in trying to make it happen. It is only when we let go of the external that we can stop trying and start being. If you practice yoga and focus only on the asana, the physical, the external, the tangible, you will never stop trying. If you live your life just focusing on goals, you will never stop trying. When we go inside of ourselves, both on and off the mat, we can be okay with exactly who we are and where we are in life and we stop trying to be anything else. We become okay with our lives being “un-done” — with the career that has yet to grow, the opportunities that have yet to manifest, the people we have yet to meet.
We move from trying to either being or not being. I am being present. I am being grateful. I am being honest. I am being sad. I am being cared for. I am not being kind. I am not being respectful. I am not being patient. We cannot fail at being — it’s something we are or we are not. We can enter and exit these states of being but there is no trying. You can be honest or not be honest, saying that you are trying to be honest is well, kind of bullshit. When we re-phrase I am trying to be more honest with: I will be open about how I feel, I will not be afraid to tell people what I am thinking, I will be comfortable in telling the truth even if it hurts people — you are already there and your efforts are directing in staying there or perhaps moving into another state of being. There is a sense of relief of not having to try, fail, try again.
We should all just try being :)~